The journey from there to here
Gideon MacLeish's Articles In Humor » Page 9
May 5, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
It's the dawning of a new day. Apparently, some 30 people in Nigeria have all selected me to move their money to America via my bank account! What an honor! Along with the various offers for viagra and numerous marriage proposals (related? Naaaah, I'd figure a woman would be looking for a mate who DIDN'T need chemical assistance to perform), are the multiple emails written in Cyrillic characters. I have no idea what they say, but if the person had to send it off so quickly they couldn't bothe...
May 5, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
It's the dawning of a new day. Apparently, some 30 people in Nigeria have all selected me to move their money to America via my bank account! What an honor! Along with the various offers for viagra and numerous marriage proposals (related? Naaaah, I'd figure a woman would be looking for a mate who DIDN'T need chemical assistance to perform), are the multiple emails written in Cyrillic characters. I have no idea what they say, but if the person had to send it off so quickly they couldn't bothe...
April 24, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
My favorite "news" source, the Onion, Link , reveals that McDonald's has joined the outlet mall trend, bu offering "Not quite perfect" menu items such as fish McGriddles and their Fruit and Pickle salad. While it would be natural to dismiss this little tidbit based on the source, let's remember they did eerily predict Gillette's five blade razor!
April 24, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
My favorite "news" source, the Onion, Link , reveals that McDonald's has joined the outlet mall trend, bu offering "Not quite perfect" menu items such as fish McGriddles and their Fruit and Pickle salad. While it would be natural to dismiss this little tidbit based on the source, let's remember they did eerily predict Gillette's five blade razor!
March 18, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
Jinny Robot Monster found a good website promoting the ice planet Hoth (if you're a Star Wars geek, you don't need an explanation. If you're not, you wouldn't understand it anyway) to host the 2014 Winter Olympics ( Link ). I have another suggestion: One continent has been consistently overlooked by the IOC, and that is the continent of Antarctica. Antarctica is the perfect choice, as it is internationally claimed, and has an abundance of ice and snow so that our athletes can do their thing....
March 18, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
Jinny Robot Monster found a good website promoting the ice planet Hoth (if you're a Star Wars geek, you don't need an explanation. If you're not, you wouldn't understand it anyway) to host the 2014 Winter Olympics ( Link ). I have another suggestion: One continent has been consistently overlooked by the IOC, and that is the continent of Antarctica. Antarctica is the perfect choice, as it is internationally claimed, and has an abundance of ice and snow so that our athletes can do their thing....
February 7, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
Link Dug this one outta the archives. Have fun with it, folks.
February 7, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
Link Dug this one outta the archives. Have fun with it, folks.
January 14, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
As I attempt to grow and develop as a writer, I've come to realize I need a few "gimmicks". Virtually every major pundit has them. Since the "War on Christmas" gimmick worked so well for Bill O'Reilly and other pundits, I felt it necessary to wage my own "war". Easter is still some time away, and I'm afraind I will have a hard time getting an exclusive franchise on that one. I'm sure the buzzards will be back, especially as "Spring" (not Easter) break comes about, despite the fact that THAT ...
January 14, 2006 by Gideon MacLeish
As I attempt to grow and develop as a writer, I've come to realize I need a few "gimmicks". Virtually every major pundit has them. Since the "War on Christmas" gimmick worked so well for Bill O'Reilly and other pundits, I felt it necessary to wage my own "war". Easter is still some time away, and I'm afraind I will have a hard time getting an exclusive franchise on that one. I'm sure the buzzards will be back, especially as "Spring" (not Easter) break comes about, despite the fact that THAT ...
December 21, 2005 by Gideon MacLeish
Hillary Clinton was being driven in her limo in upstate New York. As they drove along the rural roads, her driver accidentally struck a cow. Hillary was concerned, and asked the driver to go to the nearby farmhouse and inform them of the incident, and reimburse them, if need be. An hour quickly passed as the busy senator made calls to various lobbyists, and soon her driver came staggering out to the car with a box of expensive cigars, a half finshed bottle of fine wine, and the hickies all aroun...
December 21, 2005 by Gideon MacLeish
Hillary Clinton was being driven in her limo in upstate New York. As they drove along the rural roads, her driver accidentally struck a cow. Hillary was concerned, and asked the driver to go to the nearby farmhouse and inform them of the incident, and reimburse them, if need be. An hour quickly passed as the busy senator made calls to various lobbyists, and soon her driver came staggering out to the car with a box of expensive cigars, a half finshed bottle of fine wine, and the hickies all aroun...
November 29, 2005 by Gideon MacLeish
For the uninitiated, here's the article that keyed this off: ( Link ). Apparently, MM's a crappy tipper despite his portrayal of himself as "defender of the everyman": 10. I just got off the plane and didn't get a chance to convert my money from Euro's 9. I left a lottery ticket with it; it worked for Nick Cage's character in that movie! 8. Halliburton stole it! 7. Too much Moo shoo, not enough pork. 6. Left all my cash in the GString of the stripper at the club; she was the only...
November 29, 2005 by Gideon MacLeish
For the uninitiated, here's the article that keyed this off: ( Link ). Apparently, MM's a crappy tipper despite his portrayal of himself as "defender of the everyman": 10. I just got off the plane and didn't get a chance to convert my money from Euro's 9. I left a lottery ticket with it; it worked for Nick Cage's character in that movie! 8. Halliburton stole it! 7. Too much Moo shoo, not enough pork. 6. Left all my cash in the GString of the stripper at the club; she was the only...
October 31, 2005 by Gideon MacLeish
WARNING: I put this under "humor", and must warn readers that it's decidedly dark humour before they proceed. But I DO want all readers to understand that this is meant for satirical purposes only, and that if you have lost a loved one to violent crime, this is not meant to ridicule or minimize your grief. In an article ( Link ) that got too little attention for the subject matter, Locamama described a situation where a hanged woman was overlooked by passersby who thought it was a Halloween ...