The journey from there to here

I was reading the blog of another person whose material I read because I regard the person as a "friend" in the acquaintance sense of the word.

Interestingly enough, we've never met...but there's a scant degree of separation between the two of us. And if it were not for the internet, this person would remain a complete unknown to me (although we probably wouldn't know the same people).

Here's how it went down, for you newbies. You see, my family and I had moved to a forbidding hellhole somewhere in a remote piece of America. As we found ourselves trapped there and giving serious consideration to living out of a van for awhile (not kidding on that score), we evaluated our options. High on our list were various homeless shelters.

But, through fate or chance or whatever, there was another internet user with whom we were connected. This individual's family had land in a small Texas town, and the community offered us a chance to relocate and get back on our feet. My unemployment check, too small for the community we currently lived in, was more than ample to meet our basic needs in this Texas town.

From here, you see, the whole circle of acquaintances grows wider. Many individuals who would have otherwise been anonymous strangers, have "come alive" for me. This being the small town that it is, these users have become REAL in a way that wouldn't have been possible pre-internet. You see, as I'm hearing stories about them from the past, I'm READING materials some of these individuals are posting in the present. And they have grown to become like an extended family that I otherwise would never have known. And so, when I read their stories, I read it with an extended knowledge of who they are. With a backstory. With stories of skinned knees and high school shenanigans that don't usually form the basis of knowledge of a writer. And it's a fascinating if not occasionally disturbing concept.

I wonder if we ever really stop and think about how much the Internet has changed our lives. I'm willing to wager it's far more than we realize.


Comments
on Aug 17, 2005
I totally agree with you. The internet has changed our lives in more ways than we could ever think possible. When it's good, it's very, very good and when it's bad, boy is it sooo bad! I like to think the good outweighs the bad more often and in so enriches our lives and make it a lot better. The optimist in me says it does! Good food for thought as usual Gid!
on Aug 17, 2005
I'm in agreement too. The ointernet has allowed me to 'meet' people I now consider extended family...even though I've never actually met them in person. It's also enabled me to keep in touch with members of my close family even though we've been separated half a world away.

Good article, Gid!
on Aug 17, 2005
I have a friend that that met someone on-line. They talked together for a long time, became close friends and developed a relationship. They started to talk about meeting. Up to this point they never actually mentioned where they live.

They decided they really want to meet and to their surprise found out they live in the same city. They were setting up a time and place to meet and while making the plans realized they both live close to each other. So finally my friend asked where she lived. Ends up they lived in the same building on the same floor.

It’s funny, they have seen each other in the hall and the elevator countless times and never talked. It took the internet for them to actually meet. If they hadn’t meet on the internet they most likely never would have started a conversation with each other in person.

Glad to say that things worked out with them and they actually moved in together. Luckily it was a short move
on Aug 17, 2005
One of my dearest friends is someone I met over the net. We are from different areas of the country (I'm in NH, she's in IL), but she is closer than many of my friends who live nearby. We have gotten together several times in person over the years... and although distance separates us geographically, there is no one closer to my heart.

The internet is like anything else... can be used for good or evil. I don't think we realize how much we depend on it until the server crashes, or the ISP goes down and you don't HAVE it for a bit. I use the net for everything from sharing ideas (like here at JU) to finding recipes, and researching for my studies. Amazing resource.

Great article, Gideon
on Aug 17, 2005
Gideon - Don't know if you ever connected it (mainly because I don't post a lot here @ joeuser), but I am TW's brother. I've kind of followed your story through her, other family and joeuser. I am so glad you guys have found a home in our old house, I have so many memories from my childhood throughout her halls and rooms - I am so glad that memories are still being made in our old humble abode. God bless you and your family - and if any people from the town start giving you trouble, let me know...I still got connections... : ) Grazie e Pace!
on Aug 17, 2005
and if any people from the town start giving you trouble, let me know...I still got connections...


lol...thanks. Good to "meet" you. Yes, I did make the connection (mainly from your posts on your dad's blog), and you're one of the people I feel connected with (we go to the church of Christ there in town, so we get regular updates), although we've never met. Feel free to stop by whenever you're up this way...I'd love to hear about some of the work you've been doing.
on Aug 17, 2005
3 by mick_k
Wednesday, August 17, 2005


Now that's a wonderful story!
on Aug 17, 2005
Well, I will just add a second to Little_whip's as I met my wife on line as well!  Great Article Gid.
on Aug 17, 2005
Not to hijack, Gideon, but this seems like a good place for me to say this:

I went through some extraordinarily difficult times this past year, and being thousands of miles away from family and longtime friends, the people at JoeUser cocooned me with a sincerely caring and helpful support system, and I KNOW that if it weren't for many of you guys, I would not be where I am (which is intact and OK) today.

Gideon: From the very beginning, you have been a good friend to me, even though you had monumental struggles of your own to face. You emailed and called to check on me and let me know that you cared, and I am so grateful for that. I felt like my world was collapsing around me, and to hear a kind voice and know that someone out there cared about my well-being did so much for me.

Myrrander: The first time I encountered him, we were at odds. I never could have guessed that he would only a short time later become someone that I would consider one of my best friends. He talked me through all sorts of crazy emotions, and has never been anything but supportive and concerned. I adore Michael, and in many ways he feels like family to me.

Little Whip: She spent hours and hours counseling me and wiping up my tears from her computer screen thousands of miles away. Ever patient, she took my whining and she helped guide me to see what was true and what was false and what was constructive and what would damage me. She is a true friend, and I am so grateful for all that she's done for me. Despite her spiny exterior, no one will convince me that she's anything but a beautiful and caring friend.

Kingbee: I won't gush on about him because it might ruin his rep, hehe. But he knows what he's done for me and how much he means to me.

Dharma: I'll never forget blubbering and crying hysterically on the phone over her calm voice. She comforted me at my craziest, and provided a kind ear and solid support. I know that she did everything she could to help me, and I'm so very thankful for her kindness.

iamheather: She's no longer here, and I've haven't talked to her in a few months, but this woman is a saint. When I was at my lowest, the phone would ring, and we would talk for hours and hours, late into the night. Lots of people say, "if you need anything, let me know." Heather meant it. When I was in Texas last Christmas, she planned to have me over for New Years. She read one of my posts, and bought Smirnoff Ice, Ferro Rocher candies, and Clean Cotton Yankee candles just to make my visit to her home special. The night went badly for me because of my marital problems, and I was too distraught to visit. I am eternally disgusted with myself that I didn't spend that night with her. She is just a beautiful, beautiful person. I can't say enough about her. I know she won't read this, but I want YOU GUYS to know this about her.

There's so many more people who showed me kindness or tried to help me through my troubled times, including Ravenblack, Citahellion, Chiprj, imajinit, BlueDev, Danny Bassette, xtine, and so many more.

JoeUser is more than just a community to me. As lame is it may sound, you guys are family. A group of people that I can count on in a cold and unpredictable world.

Thank you all.
on Aug 18, 2005
just so ya know gid, my best friend inna whole world is a gal I met in a chat room 5 years ago.

right michele? heh
on Aug 20, 2005
It is definately a changing world. I met my fiance online , we have lived together for 4 years now.
on Aug 21, 2005
What amazes me is how much more I can share on Joe User or in my yahoo groups than I do with many of my "real" world friends and family. I guess in a way because I don't "really" know the people on here I can open up and be more vulnerable and less self conscious.

I have a friend who asked me to join a yahoo group she was in. I couldn't believe how much better I knew her from her posts on there compared to seeing her in real life. It was more a casual friendship in real life and much deeper in the group. It's weird huh. I haven't ever met anyone in person yet that I talked to on the internet though.