For those who know me, I have long desired to procure myself a popemobile.

I came close to buying one 5 years ago (well, actually, I SAW one, and was only $249,986.57 away from the purchase price, but in national budget terms, that's only a small amount...but I digress).

So I nearly jumped out of my seat (and gained the attention of the nazi librarian) when I saw Yahoo's news story on "popemobile" for sale. Turns out it was only Ratzinger's used Volkswagon.

Come on, people, you just don't get it. I want a POPEMOBILE; Bubble top, papal blessings, the works. I want a true, honest to goodness popemobile used to parade through crowds and deflect the slings and arrows (and bullets) of the evil ones.

It is such a bummer to twice come so close (ok, ok, so I wouldn't have the money THIS time either...but miracles DO accompany popemobiles, right?) and yet so far.

Now I have to return my attention to my secondary goal of getting myself a miter (I have concocted an elaborate scheme involving a cardboard replica, a trained yak and a box of suppositories...but I digress).