did you tell your friend that, in fact, he was in a church?

He might have missed that.

I think the reaction is due to the very vocal minority among Christians that like to yell fire and brimstone sermons atop the nearest soapbox or street corner. I have personally had some VERY bad experiences with Christians (Catholics, Baptists, Lutherans etc) who got seriously on my case because I didn't agree with something, or supported a group they found offensive. One long-time Catholic friend of mine stopped speaking to me for almost a year because she found out I did volunteer work for the AAUW (American Assoc of University Women... they happen to support Pro-Choice policies in addition to many other things). I've had Christians tell me they were disappointed that I was going to Hell, in a dismissive tone to imply that I was beyond saving because I do not personally believe in the need to go to Church.

I know many other Christians however who are welcoming, accepting and non-confrontational, but which is more effective in swaying your opinion of a group? 10 quiet nice people or 1 jerk who screams in your face over something trivial?

It's the fringe of Christianity that taints all good Christians and organizations. It is because of those sorts of Christians that I long ago decided to never belong to a physical church. I do not look down on Christian organizations, I just have chosen to go elsewhere when I feel like doing community work because I do not want to subject myself to the one crackpot who will take it upon himself to "save" me.

I was just thinking about this a week or so ago when I was helping serve dinner at our local Christian aid house. I don't think the people who were there cared that it was a Christian organization--they were just thankful for the food. Maybe you get to a point where you don't care where the help comes from as long as it's there.

Hmm, can't finish response, have to go to work.

-A.

I think the reaction is due to the very vocal minority among Christians that like to yell fire and brimstone sermons atop the nearest soapbox or street corner.

I have seen the same types of reactions. In this case, however, my friend had actually BEEN to the event; he was offended because we didn't simply feed 'em and send 'em home. The mere MENTION of Christianity offended him.

Hi, Gideon. I found your site through BlogExplosion, and after dozens of "what I ate for dinner" pages, yours is quite refreshing.

I'm responding to this post and to your later post about the spiritual journey. As a mixed-race Japanese American, my cultural and spiritual heritages are quite distinct. From my (causasian) mother, a rejected Southern Baptist via Menenite faith, and from my (Japanese) father a polyglot Buddhist-Shinto spirituality.

Sometimes it seems as though I am constantly navigating to create a stable identity from such disparate parts, to find a middle ground or a uniquely "mixed" awareness. This has sometimes been difficult: up until the 2000 census I had to choose "other" or else be forced to pick either White or Asian as my racial identity. In 2000 I was finally able to choose mixed-race. I mention this because I think the Protestant Reformation succeeded because it was about finding a faith equivalent for the "mixed-race" category.

There are aspects of the Bible that I find distasteful, and aspects of various denominations' Biblical interpretation that I also disagree with. Yet there are aspects of Jesus' teachings (and the Buddha's) that I think truly reflect a divine sensibility - particularly his instructions about nonviolence and charity. I think that it is every person's spiritual duty to read the words of our great philosphers and to glean from these texts the wisdom that will help and guide them.

This is a controversial view. For instance, my rejection of statements like I Timothy 2:11-14 ("Let a woman
learn in silence...") has sometimes led to angry confrontations with people of different faiths/denominations. But I believe that when Jesus said, "call no man father on Earth" he was encouraging his flock to find their paths to God through him, and not through strictly codified rules handed down by an earthly mediator (e.g. a Pope). Thus I see the "thousand sister faiths" not as a confusion, but as a delightful profusion, proving that faith is stronger than any one "Christian voice." It is, I believe, why Christianity is America's dominant religion despite our country's melting pot of cultures and values.

Which brings me to this article. What I imagine your old roommate was responding to, and indeed I have some qualms on this point myself, is the preeminence Christianity enjoys in this country, and which members of this faith sometimes see as their right. My father always felt more comfortable with the wisdom of Buddha than the wisdom of the Bible, and as such was distinctly ill-at-ease when volunteer organizations included religious services with their charity - it seemed to him that they were saying his religion wasn't good enough, or as worthy of attention, as a Jesus-based faith.

It is another place where I see a parallel between race and religion: a white person in this country has the luxury of not being aware of skin color because he or she is in the majority; white is America's "default" race. It is only when that person is in the (rare) position of being in the minority that they understand how beleaguered a minority can feel - how every commercial, or sitcom, or movie shows white people getting the good job, friends, and love. In a country where our media often makes it look as though minorities do not exist, I sometimes feel that the our citizens do the same thing with regards to other religions. Courtrooms are arguing over the right to post the Ten Commandments, but have any of them ever posted the Eight-Fold Path, or Koranic commandments? You defended the service because it was non-denominational and thus not offensive, but in a country that ignores the presence of a great many non-Christian religions it was yet another reiteration of the message that Christianity is the only religion that matters.

The luxury of being a majority is sometimes a certain thoughtlessness, and that is what I take issue with when religious services are attached to charity.