For those who care, I haven't fallen off the end of the world. For those who don't, I still haven't.

The other day, I was finishing off a mammoth problem for accounting. It was one of the hardest tasks I've undertaken, and at about 11:30PM the night before it was due, I was on the second to last step and discovered an error I had no clue where to find. I was devastated, and briefly the thought of withdrawing from the course popped into my head. Only briefly, though, because I quickly reminded myself that withdrawing would mean I would have to relive the first few weeks of the course all over again.

But it got me to thinking. One of the biggest missteps I've done in my life is just quitting when things got too tough. I don't want to be a quitter, never intend to be, it's just, I've gotten rather proficient about it. I'll leave it to you to connect the dots here.

When I last communicated with JoeUser, I told you guys there was more to the story, and there is. There always is. To be blunt, what you guys DON'T know could fill several cargo containers. One of the things that hit me, though, is that this is MY blog space, NOT yours, and so I've decided to test the limits of the blacklist feature. The past few weeks have shown that many of you that I considered friends are not friends, and so, frankly, I have no time for you and owe you no explanations. I'm not blogging for points, I'm blogging for me, so if you don't like what you read here, move along.

I am not perfect, and have never professed to be. Unlike the rest of you, I have had the fortune of having my failings broadcast out over the Internet, a casualty borne of my being stupid enough to allow you a window into my personal life. This is a mistake I don't intend to repeat soon. For the record, I never professed to be the one "true" Christian, I have said frequently that I am quite dysfunctional and looking for a fellowship that isn't. I'm happy to say I believe I've found that.

You guys believed a LOT of rumor in the big article, and that's all I will say about that. I'm over it, but as I have contended before, what is false, I can prove is false and I am more than willing to do so when I am called to answer for it.

In my early years on JU, I spoke about dealing with depression. I find it both sad and telling that in the midst of your stone throwing, not one (Not ONE of you...this includes the one perfect person on the planet, the newly transplanted Floridian, who had not one, but THREE children by the means of Immaculate Conception) of you connected the dots. Very few of you even gave a fig about whether I lived or died, and judging by your responses, many of you would have preferred the latter.

I was not aware that a qualification of a writer must be that they lead perfect lives. Seems an awful lot of them historically missed the mark pretty badly, actually.

I do have apologies to make and amends to make. First, to the obvious individuals, and I am trying to do that (although I am more than a little disheartened to read that the $500 I sent was considered a pittance. I was unaware that paying them back for damages should involve living our of our truck and starving my family!). Second, to Marcie and Ryan. Marcie, you're not on my blacklist at this point for one reason and one reason alone. Because when the chips were down for you, I did the exact same thing to you as was done to me. I believed rumor and gossip and was willing to believe the worst of you in every way. I was wrong, and I'm sorry and I do hope you will forgive me. But to most of you, I was wrong to assume a relationship with you that didn't exist, and I am sorry for that. I won't repeat THAT mistake, trust me.

This is the last I will write on the matter, although I am quite certain my appearance will spark not a small number of flame blogs, especially from the Chicken lady and her Yankee disciple. I will get onto blogging about what I want to blog about from here on out, although it will probably be at greater intervals than before. I wanted to let those who care, though, know that things are going quite well and that we are happy.