The journey from there to here
Published on September 13, 2004 By Gideon MacLeish In Misc
I have often heard people with chronic illness refer to having "good days and bad days". Well, our current situation is somewhat like that, only it's good MINUTES and bad minutes.

I honestly would rather be suddenly displaced than the protracted inevitability we're watching unfold before our eyes. 3 weeks of watching the mail, hoping for an unemployment check. Three weeks of application after application -- at this point I'm willing to be the designated grease trap cleaner at McDonald's. Three weeks of waiting for the phone to ring, of calling back prospective employers, to either hear that the position's filled or they're not hiring right now. It's actually a little over three weeks; Saturday will be a full month, but you get the picture.

The one bright spot is I do have some work with a day labor place, but I have to sit by my phone and hope they have a spot for me. And the phone will be disconnected Friday, so I will have to reactivate our cell phone and hope that my mother's old bill collectors don't eat up the minutes in four days like they did last month (verizon prepay charges you for the call even if you don't answer). Because literally, if they call and you don't answer, they just move down the list. Still, even if it's just 3 hours a day, it's work.

We're pretty much out of hope of getting a cheap vehicle -- not sure exactly what we're going to do when the hammer drops at this point. I can assume that I was rejected for unemployment, although they haven't done me the courtesy of notifying me to that effect (it's been two weeks and counting since my eligibility interview and I have heard nothing). I honestly don't see their reasoning for rejecting us, and frankly, an appeal at this point would be fruitless, as we'll be long displaced by the time they make any determination. We can appeal the TANF ruling, and they are kind enough to give you relief from the work requirement if you're homeless (how considerate!). Fortunately, we're good on the power until the end of the month, and when we are displaced, we'll be able to get back the balance of our deposit.

What's hitting me hardest at this point, though, is the depression. I have worked very hard to support my family, and I feel like a complete and utter failure. My wife and kids are wonderful through it all, but I have always wanted to provide more than this. I am still in utter shock that "safety nets" that are supposed to be there for us have so completely and utterly failed us.

signing off,

Gideon MacLeish

Comments
on Sep 13, 2004

 I am still in utter shock that "safety nets" that are supposed to be there for us have so completely and utterly failed us.

I'm fucking outraged, Gideon.  I'm past disappointed and shocked.  I'm trying to get you some help......the only place I can think of to turn is DSS, but I'm afraid you'll get separated.

Nothing back from the papers yet, but I'll try again tomorrow..and the next day, and the next day until somebody responds.


 

on Sep 13, 2004
Yeah, DSS is a bad idea. They would definitely separate us, and once you're in their books, you're in until the kids are 18. They are horrible.
on Sep 13, 2004
Possibly (OK, definitely) I am stupid, but what is DSS?
on Sep 13, 2004
department of social services, texas.

They're supposed to help families, but they almost always split families apart (something that would devastate my wife irreparably at this point, I am positive), and they enforce their views of child rearing on the parents, to where the parents have no choice but to comply if they want custody of the kids.

Another reason that would be bad, dharma, is my mother (a VERY abusive person, and part of what started all this) would swoop in and try for custody -- she's tried twice since we moved out here, once through trickery and the second time through trying to get the LDS church to do it for her.
on Sep 13, 2004
d'oh! I somehow wasn't making the connection with the acronym *puts on dunce hat and heads for corner*
on Sep 14, 2004


and I feel like a complete and utter failure.


The FACT that you are trying so hard proves you WRONG on this point.
Hang in there Gideon... too many people are praying for you right now and sending good vibes your way... don't give up!
Woody wouldn't (and didn't)

on Sep 14, 2004

Gideon, have you contacted the unemployment agency (not sure what they call it in your state)?  It is possible that they "lost" you in the system.  My Mom went through that not too long ago and had to reapply.  It's worth going over there and having them find out what the determination is (or, calling them if they have a support number).


You are not a failure, you just hit a speed bump. 


Do you have anything on eBay that you can sell for some cash?


With your cell phone, why don't you ahve them change your number so that you won't get the calls?


I wish I had some bright ideas to help you......

on Sep 14, 2004
Do you have anything on eBay that you can sell for some cash?


I'd bid up on stuff for you. Just don't tell the eBay police.

I think of you every day, and I feel guilty for hating my temp job so much (it ends Friday and they have nothing for me after that, so I feel for you a bit). And I agree with Manopeace on this one--you're NOT a failure, and from the sound of it, you never have been and never will be. I admire you a lot, Gid. Can't help but.

-A.
on Sep 14, 2004
And I agree with Manopeace on this one


you mean you dont agree with everything I say?
on Sep 14, 2004
Gideon, have you contacted the unemployment agency (not sure what they call it in your state)? It is possible that they "lost" you in the system. My Mom went through that not too long ago and had to reapply. It's worth going over there and having them find out what the determination is (or, calling them if they have a support number).


No, they keep sending out the claim forms, so they haven't lost me. They just haven't made a final determination. My guess is my ex boss (the one who was so kind as to fire me without warning 2 weeks after Quinn was born) is fighting this, and I may not win this claim.

Do you have anything on eBay that you can sell for some cash?


Not much, but I may check around and see if I can come up with something.