Blogs Breaking News, Breaking Ground

Published on September 4, 2004 By Gideon MacLeish In Humor

Reset your homepages, ladies and gentlemen. No longer can you rely on CNN and MSNBC to relay the breaking news people really want to hear. Now, Joeuser is quickly taking the place of the news source of the completely informed.

Today's earthshaking breaking news story, detailing John Kerry's father raping tendencies (Link) are only the latest in a long line of news stories that have broken right here on joeuser. On July 15, I was first to report Kerry's penchant for puppy mutilation (Link), a story I would have expected the mainstream media to have appropriated by now.

So now, ladies and gentleman, joeuser is your first choice for the news others don't want you to hear

Signing off (tongue firmly planted in cheek),

Gideon MacLeish

Comments

adnauseam

on Sep 04, 2004

Yes, Gideon,
And Bill C. does not enjoy fellatio.
Love your writing. Cheers.

JillUser

on Sep 04, 2004

nyuck nyuck! Love it!

Gideon MacLeish

on Sep 10, 2004

I don't usually like to do this, but I have to bump myself in light of recent events.

look at the date of the original article.

NOW, look at where the information on the CBS hoax was "outed". Blogs. Now, I meant this piece as entirely humorous (unless Kerry really DOES eat babies -- more on that later), but it seems strangely prophetic in light of the events of the last week.

cactoblasta

on Sep 10, 2004

Keep an ear out - I think that baby-eating Kerry story is just days away now.

Gideon MacLeish

on Sep 10, 2004

I'm just kind of stoked with the fact that I'm now a newsperson with equal credibility as Dan Rather...lol.

Now if I could just get his paycheck.

(Maybe I should submit my blogs to 60 Minutes?)

Welcome Guest! Please take the time to register with us.
There are many great features available to you once you register, including:

Richer content, access to many features that are disabled for guests like commenting on the forums.
Access to a great community, with a massive database of many, many areas of interest.
Access to contests & subscription offers like exclusive emails.
It's simple, and FREE!