Friday the 13th has always been the bane of my existence. Over the course of my life, I have one broken humerus bone, seven stitches, various cuts, bruises and sprains, all occurring on, you guessed it...Friday the 13th.
So, I started out today thinking, no, hoping, it would be different. And it started out that way. We had two water lines, two sewer lines, and two phone conduits to lay today...not a terribly hard job, except that we were working on postage stamp sized lots in the ritzy section of town.
So, water line one, no problem. Tested, no leaks. Pressure tested, again no leaks. With the exception of a finicky fitting, the sewer laid out nicely. And the phone conduit went together as perfectly as phone conduits can.
Then we moved to the second job site. I now know Hell's address, and that it is centered in Nevada.
To start with, when I got there, my backhoe operator had boxed himself in, so I had to lay out the beginning of the sewer line and phone conduit, have him cover it, then lay out the rest...a tricky feat to be sure, since you have to ensure constant fall (rule #1: shit rolls downhill).
Well, he covered the sewer line, but the dirt knocked down the fitting so that the open end was angled up. And the phone conduit was simply buried. We had to head over and do the water, though, which started out allright. Then, he left me to tie it all together while he went to get some dirt to "shade in" the line so that the rocky soil wouldn't bust apart. In less than a minute he was back, and, paying no attention to me, simply dumped the dirt all over the open fittings. Which meant dirt in the line. Which we can't have.
After struggling with yet another persnickety fitting, the water line came together. Again, no leaks. So, we went back to the phone and sewer. My backhoe operator initially insisted I uncover the phone conduit myself (in 30 feet of open trench on a slope, it's nearly impossible to determine where it is). Eventually, we got it out and the phone conduit together. Then to the sewer. We eventually had to remove the pipe from the fitting and readjust the angle. All of this took us an extra two hours, which the boss didn't really appreciate.
So, Friday the 13th was over, right? Nope. I get home, quite dehydrated, and ingest a large amount of water, on which I choke, spewing it all over the computer screen and keyboard, shorting out the keyboard (fortunately, I had an extra). So it took me 4 tries and 2 keyboards to write this damn blog.
Make that five tries. My internet connection just farted out on me.
Next Friday the 13th, I'm gonna stay home sick.
signing off,
Gideon MacLeish