OK, sorry...one of those "inspired by another blog title" posts. Please note it is humor and I do not mean to disparage the many noble homeless people out there.
Ups:
*All it takes to put that "sparkle" back in her eye is a bottle of mad dog
*"Dinner and a movie" is as cheap as standing in line at the mission and watching the crackwhore fight with her pimp from the fire escape outside of apartment 3B.
*Toofless women are great at fellatio; no obstacles
*You don't have to worry about driving her home
*If you're the "strong, silent type", you don't have to worry. The voices in her head will say enough that she won't even notice
*Lovely trinkets to please her can be as simple as a good dumpster dive
Downs:
*Sex in a Walmart shopping cart is a logistical impossibility
*You might have "Frank" looking in on your moments of intimacy
*You think the dog climbing on you during sex is bad? Try rats
*The crackwhore in 3B has a gun. And she's not afraid to use it
*Apu won't sell you the mad dog because your license is from Jersey
*Secret may be "made for a woman" but it NOTHING's THAT strong
Anybody have any more to contribute?
signing off (tongue firmly planted in cheek),
Gideon MacLeish