The journey from there to here
Published on July 31, 2004 By Gideon MacLeish In Misc
Allow me to introduce you to my wife.

She works at least 80 hours a week, is a business woman, an educator, and does a good deal of work in the health care field. She is, however, highly frowned upon in the world of "professional" women.

I say this because my wife is a stay at home mom.

The trend towards equality between men and women is a very good thing; personally, I feel that women should be able to achieve anything in life that they desire, just as men should. They should be able to make choices that direct their destiny and lead to full contentment and happiness in life. Those choices should not, however, be limited to the "professional" arena.

To call a stay at home mother anything less than a professional is to be ignorant of the facts. Mothers are often the child's first teacher, as basic reading, writing and math skills are usually learned by a child before they enter kindergarten. Stay at home mothers also often direct the family's finances, and are always involved in the day to day physical maintenance of the house. It is no surprise to me, then, when there is a faction of professional women that CHOOSE to return home to be with their children and either scale back or postpone their professional careers at least during the early part of their children's lives. There is, however, very little support among the feminist community for this mindset. They often feel that such women are lessening the rights of other women by resigning themselves to traditional female roles, even if it's clearly by choice.

I am 100 percent in support of equal rights, and will gladly lend my time and support to stand up for the rights of women in the workforce. But I will stand equally strong in support of those women who choose to stay home and make their primary career choice that of wife and mother. It is just as noble a calling (and MAY be more so).

signing off,

Gideon MacLeish

Comments
on Jul 31, 2004
I consider myself a fierce feminist. When I say this, it does not mean that I look down upon women who choose to pursue certain opportunities or not pursue certain opportunities. My mother was a teacher for 10 years before she had children. At 33, she retired and stayed home as my brother and I grew up-- our father was an accountant, so during tax season, he would leave early in the morning, and come home late at night. I feel enormously fortunate that I grew up in a household where one constant source of income was enough to support everyone (before they had children, my father was still in grad school and my mother had the money to buy the house). Having been involved in the civil rights movement when she was younger, she raised us to respect people no matter how different they were and aiming to improve social institutions to encourage that value. One of the things that she has passed on to me is her sense of identity being a woman, and how women should have the same opportunities and respect in the classroom and the workplace as men. Just because a woman has the opportunity to be in the office does not mean that it is necessary in order to respect whatever extreme cause others warp "feminism" to be. To me, feminism is demanding equality for women. The same opportunities. The same rights. To let her choose how she lives her life based on her own affirmations, whether or not they coincide with what the culture at the time deems as valuable. Demeaning another woman for choosing the way she lives her life is the very antithesis of feminism.
on Aug 01, 2004
Your reply is a genuine summation of what feminism should be. Thank you for that well worded response.