In a soldiers stance, I aimed my hand
At the mongrel dogs who teach
Fearing not that Id become my enemy
In the instant that I preach
My existence led by confusion boats
Mutiny from stern to bow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
Im younger than that now.
(My Back Pages, Bob Dylan)

A couple of recent projects have really made me think about the person I once was vs. the person I am now. Over the years I've travelled a path I could not have even remotely imagined at 18, nor at 22 during my first, botched attempt at college.

Part of the change had to do with marriage. The best treatment for know-it-all-ism is often marriage (although recent experience with some couples have led me to believe this treatment doesn't always take). For most of us, though, if we start flying too close to the sun, we can count on the spouse to remind us that we are generally being buttheads.

Part of the change had to do with aging. I look in the mirror and it doesn't usually seem like I've aged much. Still no grey hair, still no receding hairline, and that signpost with the big "4-0" ain't that far in the distance. I'm hoping I'll get my Bachelors before I get there. I guess I've picked up a little wisdom on the road back there somewhere.

Part of it had to do with faith. Oh, sure, I'm still way too much of a hothead. I've mellowed in some ways, become more passionate in others. While it may not always seem obvious, I DO tend to pick my battles.

Parenthood had a lot to do with it as well. There's nothing more humbling than when you chide your child for doing something, then stop and realize they're just copying you.

And part of it had to do with a number of things I can't so easily define. Friends, life circumstances, things I've read or listened to...To list them all would take forever.

I'm starting to see that at some points in life, as parts of you get older, some parts get younger as well. I'm not as embarassed to do something stupid, because I know there will be a tomorrow. At 18, there's no way I would get up on stage in front of 100 people and play the guitar and sing. And DEFINITELY no way I'd be bold enough to add some of the choices to my playlist. And certainly no way I would have the confidence that has carried me so easily through this go round at college.

At 22, I thought I understood the words to Bob Dylan's "My Back Pages". Now, at 37, I realize I'm only starting to.