The tired puppet master returned from another harrowing day. He was growing tired of the politics of it all. For what seemed like the thousandthe time, his nemesis, the Acrhduke of Toadberry, had attempted to upstage him with a fancy new show, using pyrotechnics and some newfangled marinettes (sic...extra credit, LW?). The handbills that were distributed liberally through the square advertised the show as a "wang-dang-doodle of family fun".

As he reheated last night's eggplant parmesan, he could hear the conga line of suckholes next door kissing up to the landlord, hoping to bump their way up in line for repairs and the beloved tenant of the month award. He slowly perused his copy of "Cat Hair Weaving for Dummies" as he awaited his favorite UPN show "Adventures in Toenail Clipping" Starring the inimitable Martin Lawrence and Debra Messing.