The journey from there to here

At the request of a friend, my family and I decided to check out a local church that is popular in the area. We went, and we dropped our kids off for Sunday School in a nicely painted room where they played video games for the next hour. My wife and I went to a class where there was a speaker on tape to present the materials.

We went on to church, and the children stayed in "children's church", the youngest two in the nursery. The people were nice enough, but the entire sermon focused on obtaining money, and, rather than a prayer before the offering, there was a nicely recited chant "trusting God for" a number of things, all of which revolved around the acquisition of material goods.

I wasn't happy with it, as so much of scripture revolves around the idea of not being able to serve both God and Mammon, and much of Jesus' teachings go on to seem to indicate that the pursuit of financial wealth is not the proper set of priorities for a Christian. But I'm increasingly beginning to suspect that that's my own bias guiding that, rather than common sense. The fact is, THEIR lives are working, mine is not. I didn't mind being underemployed when I moved here, now I'm just plain sick of it. There are no factory jobs to be had, and the local nonprofits dealing with developmentally disabled operate on a VERY strict affirmative action program; your application is scored on points, with your race and gender being serious multipliers. As a white male, that pretty much means that, unless I'm the only applicant, I'm not getting the job. That pretty much eliminates most of my work experience being relevant to the available work in our area, and I really don't think I'm PHYSICALLY able to stand up to 40+ hours a week in the hot summer sun all year round.

The fact is, the only way to get so many jobs anymore is to somehow network with the people that have the jobs to offer. The only way to do that around here is to go to the same churches, civic clubs, etc, as those individuals.

Every fiber of my being despises the thought of using church to network to improve our financial situation. But ideals don't put food on the table; they don't pay the bills. And with the cost of gasoline rising at an insane rate, it's unlikely I'll be able to continue supporting my family as a "media distribution specialist". And working at McDonald's is a less practical option, not to mention an unappetizing one (literally and figuratively).

So, I'll probably keep going to this church. These guys are successful at one thing: making money. And they'd be the right people to know. But I can't overcome the fact that this is NOT what I would rather be doing.


Comments
on May 01, 2006
Gideon, honestly, I don't see how you do it. I can't imagine supporting a family of 7 on newspaper delivery salary.

Have you considered going back to school? You should be able to get grants and loans which should cover the expense of school and probably even some of your living expenses. Maybe work on a degree in something you see locally that interests you?

Even though living simply is something you do well, is it fair to those babies of yours?

I don't mean to be offensive, and I realize that may offend you. Pregnancy has kicked my bluntness up a notch. Sorry.
on May 01, 2006
Gideon, honestly, I don't see how you do it. I can't imagine supporting a family of 7 on newspaper delivery salary.


I make well over the median income for this area, Tex. I would be taking a SERIOUS pay cut to work in minimum wage employment around here. It's not the job, it's the employment opportunities in the area.

Have you considered going back to school? You should be able to get grants and loans which should cover the expense of school and probably even some of your living expenses. Maybe work on a degree in something you see locally that interests you?


Let's see: moving (again) to get to a decent school, living out of apartments because renting a house costs too much? Not a practical alternative. And I would still need employment while continuing my education.



Even though living simply is something you do well, is it fair to those babies of yours?


My children have not gone to bed hungry one single night in their lives. They've always had a roof over their heads. I have NEVER been unfair to them in THAT regard.

I still refuse to believe that the only important thing in life is how much money you accumulate. But maybe I'm horribly wrong in that regard.
on May 01, 2006
Gideon:
Let's see: moving (again) to get to a decent school, living out of apartments because renting a house costs too much? Not a practical alternative. And I would still need employment while continuing my education.


I only suggested it because it's what I did. I attended WT while living in Lefors and working. It's possible.

It's just a suggestion. I know you said you make well above median income, but you also said in your article that you are underemployed.

My children have not gone to bed hungry one single night in their lives. They've always had a roof over their heads. I have NEVER been unfair to them in THAT regard.


That's not what I meant. I know that your children's needs are met. But I'm also one who believes in taking the kids to Burger King when they have cool toys and birthday parties with decorations and games and gifts and new toys when we go to Wal-Mart and Friday afternoon trips to the movie theater with popcorn and soda and candy, and on and on.

It's not the money you accumulate. It's the experiences that money can provide. We come from different places on this.
on May 01, 2006

But I'm also one who believes in taking the kids to Burger King when they have cool toys and birthday parties with decorations and games and gifts and new toys when we go to Wal-Mart and Friday afternoon trips to the movie theater with popcorn and soda and candy, and on and on.

Right. Because a birthday party's not a birthday party without those things.

I know what you're trying to say, Tex, but LOVE, not material things, builds a family.

Going to WT is not practical because my wife does not drive. While I would prefer that she did, it's not something I'm EVER going to change where she's concerned. I accepted that fact MANY years ago. My work/school really needs to be confined to the immediate area, because I need to be available to drive. I might also point out that we don't really have the benefit of extended family.

This is a frustrating time for us because, up until three years ago, I always had a good job (sometimes two or three). The difficulty I'm facing here is that the paper pays too well to just quit it, but none of the minimum wage jobs want to work around my schedule, and none of the better jobs hire unless you are "connected". Since I don't have family here, my only hope of getting "connected" is through church. Also, none of the jobs where I have experience are hiring around here.

I nearly killed myself in pursuit of the almighty buck for five and a half years, Tex. Literally (I still have heart problems because of it that I try not to discuss too much). During that time, we HAD it all: a VERY nice conversion van, a campground membership in the Wisconsin northwoods, birthday parties at Chuck E. Cheese. We took a major vacation every year. But when I wasn't on vacation, I was ALWAYS working. Non stop, 24 hours a day on call. One year, I worked right at 350 days out of that year. The money's no fun if you can't enjoy it.

I could probably make a better income if I were willing to work 2 or 3 jobs, sure. But I really don't think I can handle it, healthwise. What I would like to do is find an employer who appreciates my skills and abilities enough to pay me for them. I'm working on the writing (and gradually getting somewhere, it's just at what seems to be a snail's pace), and still working on the paralegal studies, though I don't know how much good that will do around here. If the college campus in Pampa goes ahead with its plans to offer EMT courses at the campus, a lot of that may change. But we'll wait and see on that one.

on May 01, 2006
Small town living is the life!  I have loved the few times I have lived in one (I am not a Yuppie).  But it has its draw backs, one of them being lack of choice.  Sorry there is not more for you.  Maybe I can get the Catholic church to drop ship a parrish to you?   j/k
on May 01, 2006

Man Gid, that is a rough spot.

Perhaps with time you will find a niche in the church to fill..something small, even if its leading a Sunday school class...then you could make sure your Sunday school class is getting real "meat."

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time.

on May 02, 2006

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time.

Well, it's not too bad. We've certainly had it worse (ie, Nevada). It's just frustrating, because, although things seem to be happening for us (I am in contact with a publisher for a certain project), they're just happening at a MUCH slower pace than I would like.

Perhaps with time you will find a niche in the church to fill..something small, even if its leading a Sunday school class...then you could make sure your Sunday school class is getting real "meat."

I think this is that particular church's chosen "style" for Sunday School, though. Just gonna have to roll with the punches on this one, though.